Hippies with British accents

Yesterday, Wednesday, a small sleet storm hit the general area I live in.  As I was getting ready to head out the door I got a mass text message from my boss informing all people at my work that we had two extra hours to get to work, which is the nice way of saying that "we're opening two hours late," because nobody decides to make it to work two hours before they HAVE to.  Being fully dressed and ready to go, I decided to lay down on my love seat, set my phone alarm for 75 minutes in the future, and proceed to have the most awesome dream ever.

In my dream I came home after the sleet storm to find all of my stuff thrown outside of my apartment, for a reason that only makes sense in dream logic I was kicked out of my apartment.  As I rummaged through my things trying to figure out how I was going to put all my material possessions into my car a young, blonde hippie and a scantly clad, attractive young woman wondered by.  Seeing the problem I was facing the wise hippie, who I discovered had a very British accent, offered me great advice on giving up some of my possessions and helped me to select what to keep (the only thing I can remember was that a shirt I had recently worn was thrown out and a box of crayons was deemed worthy of keeping).  With the entirety of my possessions audited and throughly whittled down, and packed into my car I was ready to part ways when the hippie and his buxom and bouncy (as I had learned while talking with them) companion offered to let me stay with them.  Yeah it sounds like a TV pilot, and I'm sure any psychoanalyst, especially Freudians would have a field day with the young woman in the dream.  I would have more to say about living with the two, but at that point a coworker called and asked when I was coming into work.

The oddest thing about this whole dream was that the hippie offered me advice that was good in the real world.  It was like my subconscious looked out, saw the slump my conscious mind has been in recently, and then counseled it via my dream, creating a stripper and a hippie to help me figure things out in my life.  It was wonderful in it's own way and even though it is strange to you I want to share it with the world anyway.

Yesterday Jack Lalanne, who I consider a personal hero and inspiration, passed away at age 96.  I read this news from the blog of the Ultra Marathon Man Dean Karnes this afternoon at lunch, just before I bit into a large mushroom swiss burger with fries, and immediately felt worse for it.

For those of you who don't know, Jack Lalanne is called the Godfather of fitness and is know for a number of things such as records in push-ups, and pull-ups, as well as being a 1940s Mr. America and hosting the first workout with me TV show.  Much of what he preached as good health in the areas of exercise and nutrition were considered quackery initially but later validated by medical science.  He wrote several books and did several feats, often on his birthday, to say just because you're growing older doesn't mean you can stop.  One of these included swimming from the famous prison Alcatrez to Fisherman's Warf handcuffed, the next year he repeated the feat while towing a row boat.  

The amazing feats of strength were less impressive and inspiring, to me, compared to his charisma and showmanship with which he sold healthy eating and exercise.  Just go to youtube and watch some of his vintage stuff.  His long life proved his theories worked.  My grandmother, when I mentioned it to her, made the comment it was sad he passed but it wasn't like he had a hard life in poverty, which is true, but he did have to work an extra job to keep his first gym (which was the first "modern gym") going.  He also, despite a chronic knee injury that disqualified him for service, managed to con his way into the navy by showing the doctor he could do finger tip, handstand, and one armed push-ups.  Let me restate that, in the largest scale war the world has ever known, he had a free pass to stay home safe, and instead he insisted on going to fight. Twenty years later, able bodied men fled to Canada and willing went to prison to avoid service.  So perhaps not a hard life, but neither was it one devoid of work and aspiration.

I think I consider him a hero because he trail blazed a healthy lifestyle, and I admire the clear zeal for life that he had.  All of my famous heroes have that (Fred Rogers and Teddy Roosevelt too).  I feel bad that he did not make his goal of 100 + years, but at the same time the remarkable vitality that he kept up into his later years (reportedly he still exercised two hours a day into his 90s) clearly demonstrated that he was right.  He autographed a picture for me once, an 8 x10 of him in his mid 80s, and on it he wrote "Eric, you're neat.  Keep up your workouts ALWAYS.  Health and Happiness always, Jack Lalanne."  When I finished running White Rock this December, barefoot, I gave the same answer he did when asked by Grucho Marx as to why he swam from Alcatrez handcuffed.  He was a short strong man, I know that I'll probably never equal his feats, but in life he inspired me, and now with his passing, i think it is time to be inspired again to be as extraordinary as I can be.

I remember when I was in middle school there was a slight trend for W.W.J.D. written on clothing, lanyards, and other items.  Not a huge main stream trend, but a blip among the really devout Christian crowd.  For those of you who do not know what W. W. J. D. means, it stands for "What Would Jesus Do?"  This phrase comes from Charles Sheldon's book "In His Steps," which was written a little over a hundred years before I was in middle school, and tells the story of a group of people who all agree that for one year they will not make any decisions without asking the question "What Would Jesus Do?"  Here is the conclusion I've reached:

If you believe that Jesus was the Son of God, which is the area in which I put my stock, then asking yourself this phrase should mean that you know immediately what the all mighty wishes for you to do as his son is a pretty good role model.  This is great, except for one scathing detail, the son of the creator of the universe has a lot of insight as to what is the right thing to do always.  In contrast, we could assume small things, such as he would resist temptation, or not harm someone.  From there it gets more murky.  In the Bible we know that Jesus forgave the men arresting him, and a whole blood thirsty mob that had him nailed to a cross, but what about other times.  What would he do if he was being more than assaulted?  What if Jesus was being forced to do something he didn't want to do, such as rape?  No one would blame the rape victim for lashing out at their attacker to get away, but would Jesus lash out.  Remember that this is the man who healed the soldier that was taking him to his execution (after Peter cut off his ear).  Would Jesus just take it?

More and more what I gather as I turn this situation over in my own mind, is that Jesus would avoid the situation with the perfect one liner.  He was really good at that, or a parable, or something else impressive.  The Son of God has a commanding presence no doubt, and a high charisma.  So what about those of us who don't have those gifts.  This situation, along with others makes me question the whole WWJD thing.  What would the messiah do?  Well he would not question himself because he is the Son of the God, meaning he's not some stupid chump who needs to wonder whether he's right or wrong.

I haven't put much faith in that phrase ever.  Even when reading Sheldon's book I immediately recognized the fallacy of his argument. The known, proclaimed, and announced Son of God knows how to handle himself.  I don't, and if I had the time everyday to figure out what he would do then I would be an amazing person, but in a split decision I have no idea what he would do.  I'm human, and I think he accepts that.  I don't blame him because I put it in my head I should try to live up to being like him.  I just wish I had more insight.

There's something edifying about striving for a goal

Today I ran two hours and forty-five minutes.  This is the second longest I have ever run, with the only time that has ever been longer (in terms of time) being the Austin City Marathon.  This workout was in preparation for the White Rock Marathon in a little over a month.  My training was derailed by sickness, and weariness from work, but I have been dutifully making my long runs and I am sure that if I put in a good November I will have a good race.

At some point I got it into my head, perhaps from reading Dean Karnazes' books that I too could be an ultra marathon runner.  I still have that hope, but first I have to become a good marathon runner and that may take a few years all on its own.  Today I am reading a book on Zen philosophy, which is my intermission reading from a long book on Teddy Roosevelt.  The effect of the Zen book has me questioning my motivations for everything.  Why do I run?  Why do I want to be a marathon runner or an ultra marathon runner?  What else do I want?  Perhaps because my reading this book is in such close proximity to reading a biography on my boyhood hero (yes as a child I counted Teddy Roosevelt as a hero, I am sorry if my childhood heroes are better than yours), that I think that marathon running. . .that running is part of a process that is designed to allow me to live my life completely.  Teddy Roosevelt lived his life completely, fully, and intensely.  He loved his life, I am sure of this, and by all accounts lived in such a way that it became larger than life.

Though I have humbler ambitions than president, soldier, writer, explorer and scientist (which were all hats worn by Teddy), I want to live a life that completely.  I want to live my life completely and fill it with stories that others want to hear.  I want to be the positive or extraordinary subject of others' stories, maybe not larger than life, but certainly stretching the boundaries of life, making it creak and grown just a bit to fit in what I have done.  I am getting there, I think.  Of course if I truly wished to live a life to rival the former president, I would be wise to expand my interest.  Not that I am in competition to see who can have the better life, though it does occur to me that if I live my life in such a way as I intend to compete with Teddy in the great here after that I will be assured an amazing life.

Of course all of this is just random jotting of thoughts.  The point is I'm getting ready for a marathon and if it goes well, I hope to be transformed to a more spectacular runner who can handle marathons and other challenges more frequently.  In 2011 I'd like to complete more adventures (the tough mudder and warrior dash obstacle courses, the Austin City Marathon, Perhaps the OKC marathon as well, and all three stages of the Carl's Endurance run, all to be capped with another Honored Hero half marathon, and White Rock again).  Today when I was ready to quit, just 15 minutes left I stopped listening to the rap, rock, dance music, and anime themes that had sustained me for 2:30 hours, and switched to Rainbow Connection by Kermit the Frog.  It's nice to be reminded that it is okay to dream.

Chasing Windmills

I could not find an exact, and spelled out piece for the concept I was looking for from Alderian concept I vaguely remember associating with myself.  Instead I will paraphrase it like this:  As children we develop these someday fantasies, that we believe if we should achieve we will be perfect.  A sort of perfect self anyway.  Reality, naturally, may vary.

Putting myself into that concept I thought if only I could make it into college, I'd have met perfection.  So I did.  And when I got there, I thought if I finished then life would be grand, and of course I did.  Master's, and now job.  I'm still looking for perfection.  For the time the professional drive has been stunted, I have no desire to do anything but my job well.  I have no ambition currently to become a supervisor or other mucky muck.  To make more money for doing a harder job, or attain more power or influence.  I am quiet happy where I am.  I do occasionally feel bad that I am not yet a dietitian, which is what I should be by now, and I am certain I one day will be, but for right now I am not interested.  I go to work, every two weeks I get a performance review and I have nailed all of them so far.  Not all of my patients care what I have to say, but every week I connect with a few and I know I change there life and it is powerful and edifying in way that one most experience to understand.  I make a difference.

Of course I have perfection to meet outside of work now.  I need to repay my student loans, and I know I will.  I also want to prove myself in other ways too.  I feel that I have finally made piece with my physical appearance, though I may very well attempt braces in the not so distant future if I can find a way to afford them. The piece I have made is that I am short and skinny, so what.  I have tested my body more than once in half marathons, and have even completed in a full marathon. I am working towards another and have plans to run both obstacle courses and marathons in 2011.  I guess the perfection I seek now in this area is performance, of course running a marathon last time took me down a notch and it may very well do so again.  I also have been engaged in a some what slow, cautious, and half hearted search for a person to call my significant other.  I say it is all of these things because I do feel a need to have this person in my life, and I am aware that as I get older finding someone is going to get harder, especially someone who is in my age range and has no children.  Still I am much more cautious now.  I am not certain how this is going to work out because I know more than any other area this is going to be the area that will be the most trying because it requires me to be dependent upon another to achieve this goal, and I know it is impossible to meet perfection because this will be a living, breathing, growing thing to work on.  Maybe that is why I am so "cautious," maybe it is because I am unwilling to move forward and put in the effort into a project where I cannot fool myself into believing there is a perfection.

Overall though anymore I want to be happy.  I think that is the closest and surest way for me to meet perfection is to live my life fully and completely.  There will come a time will I will need to unselfishly give myself to others such as a life partner, resulting children, and other family, friends, community, and of course the good Lord himself.  For the moment though I feel that I can pursue my own life freely, and I think I am ready to lead the kind of life that others will want to hear about later.  I think it is time to chase another windmill and see what adventure is between here and there.